I am human. I struggle. I’ve been missing. Not because life has been busy, that’s a constant, but due to my own perfection. I didn’t feel like I had anything good to write. That my posts weren’t good enough, they weren’t perfect. What if you judged me for the comma splice, or the misuse of the comma, or some other grammar error? This plagues me as writer, but I am not perfect, I am human.
This is something that I struggle with every day. I don’t know if it’s my trait as a Virgo, or just a symptom of my insecurity. Probably a little bit of both. I tried to keep this blog happy, because I feel this world could use more positives, but this is life. It is not all unicorns, rainbows, and lollipops. (And for those people that judged my use of the Oxford comma. You can take my “dangling comma” and shove it where the sun don’t shine. I like the Oxford comma.) There are days when things are hard, days were my bad mom status runs rampant. Today alone I forgot the snow pants for daycare, I missed a note in the agenda and forgot to send the oldest with three trinkets for paint day and I lost part of my breakfast – again. This was the first two hours of me being up. Yes, I fail. I think we all fail at some point, but every minute, hour and day is a new opportunity to try again.
I’ve had a lot of failures in the kitchen too. I made a carrot ginger soup that was a clear miss. I may have ruined my kids on ever eating carrot ginger soup again. I’ve also messed up muffins, either dry, burnt, flat, or forgot ingredients. It happens. Mistakes happen. Accidents happen. I say this to my kid and I accept it, but when it comes to me, I am so hard on myself. Those mess ups are hard to forget, I am not sure why, but I replay them. I replay them and punish myself for them…but those mess ups do not define me or you. We are so much more than our failures.
This is a pretty vulnerable post for me. And it’s a struggle to push publish, but I know I am not alone, and who ever stumbles across this post, you are not alone either. We are all figuring it out as we go. We all fail, a glimpse on Facebook, Pinterest, Instagram, is just that – a glimpse. Photos are shot in multiples with filters and sometimes posed. That is not life. Life is messy, chaotic, unpredictable, and imperfect, which is perfect.